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Amanda Chatel Jaina Grey
Gear
For the most sensitive parts of the human body, friction is the enemy. Here's how to keep it at bay with our favorite lubes made of water, silicone, or natural oil.
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I'LL SCREAM IT from the mountaintops as often as I have to: Everyone should have a bottle of lube at home! Whether you prefer to get it on in your bedroom, on the kitchen floor, or bent over the couch, lube should always be within reach and ready. Lube is a sexually active person’s best friend and not only helps prevent friction during penetration, which can lead to micro-tears and chafing, but can also take your oral sex game to new heights. We've tried several kinds, from silicone to oil to water—these are the best lubes we've tested.
Be sure to check out our many other sex guides, including the Best Sex Toys, Best Condoms, Best Vibrators, Best Clitoral Suction Toys, and Best Sex Machines.
Updated October 2024: We added the Lelo Personal Moisturizer, Dame Aloe, Bijoux Indiscrets Massage Drops, and Playground Pillow Talk.
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Lube Types: Silicone, Water, and Natural Oil
There are three kinds of lubes to be aware of: Water-based, silicone-based, and oil-based.
Water-based lubes are by far the most common because of their compatibility with silicone toys and latex condoms. These lubes also tend to be the most affordable—they’re water-based, after all—so you’re going to find them both online and in sex shops easily. High-quality water-based lubes may as well be called aloe-based lubes because Aloe barbadensis leaf gel is the primary thickener in almost all of them. This substance provides a high degree of slickness without leaving behind a sticky residue. (Sometimes a mushroom extract is also used to help achieve a silky-smooth texture.) However, not all water-based lubes are made equal, and some might feel sticky. They have a bad habit of getting absorbed by the skin quickly, so they need to be reapplied more frequently than other lubes. In other words, finding your favorite requires a bit of trial and error. Still, they're body-safe, toy-safe, and won’t mess with the integrity of a latex condom, so they're by far the most no-fuss option.
Silicone lubes, on the other hand, are oil-based and they provide a much higher degree of friction reduction and last longer because they're not as readily absorbed by the skin. Because they are oil-based, you have to be careful not to stain your sheets or clothes when using them. Additionally, silicone lubes can degrade silicone toys over time, so it's best to keep most of your toys away from silicone lube (though glass and stainless steel toys and silicone lube get along great).
Natural oil-based lubes are becoming more common, and they typically use plant oils like coconut oil or avocado oil to provide lubrication. The upside of these is that they play nicely with silicone toys and won't degrade them like silicone-based lubes will, and because they're made from natural oils, they usually smell pretty good. The downside is that they're a little more finicky and don't provide as much lubrication as silicone-based lubes. Oil-based lubes also can’t be used with latex condoms and can leave behind one heck of a stain on your sheets.
How to Test a Lube's Consistency
Just about every sex shop has a couple of tester lubes available. Like the makeup testers at Ulta or Sephora, they're there so you can get an idea if it's the right pick for you.
The way I usually do this is what I call the thumb test. Squirt a little droplet onto your thumb and rub it between your thumb and index or middle finger. You're trying to get a sense of how the lube feels when it rubs out a bit. If you can feel the texture of your thumbprint, it's a pretty thin lube, which will give you a more tactile feel. If it feels like the lube makes a bit of a cushion between your fingertips, it's a thicker and, in my experience, slicker lube offering less friction. If it gets sticky or dry relatively quickly, then that should be a hard pass. Applying and reapplying lube shouldn’t be the star of the show, so don’t let it be.
Amanda Chatel is a sexual health and wellness writer with more than a decade of experience. She was the sex and relationships writer for Bustle for seven years. In addition to WIRED, Amanda has written for Vogue, Glamour, Shape, Self, Harper’s Bazaar, The Atlantic, Teen Vogue, and more. She has... Read more
Contributor
Jaina Rodriguez Grey is a product writer and reviewer at WIRED covering coffee, sex tech, and gaming. Previously, she was a legal researcher for Thomson Reuters and a tech reporter for Digital Trends. She currently resides in Portland, Oregon, with her partner and a pet rabbit named Lola.
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